The Female Orgasm: The Female Orgasm (Violence, Depravity, Effacement...

The Female Orgasm: The Female Orgasm (Violence, Depravity, Effacement...

Ding Ding! Rocky IS realistic!

Contrary to popular stupidity, Rocky is a great drama realistically portraying a lobotomised stroke victim scraping a living on the seamen soaked streets of Philadelphia who gets a shot at beating up a rich gay negro and trained by an angry shouting paedophile with a tumour for a head and sand in his 200 year old spit bucket of a vagina.

This is nothing new to the sweet science. Mongoloid whitey vs uppity soul brother is to boxing what shitting is to prunes.

Yet the heart of the film is Rocky and Adrian's relationship. Its a classic 'retard romance' which so easily could have been a bare knuckle comedy if instead of punching dead cows in a meat locker like a demented ape, he kicked the shit out of Adrian's hamsters in her pet shop (nudge-nudge). His televised beef battering serves as a possible crude metaphor for his obsession with trying to get into Adrian's comatose snatch, an environment not unlike a meat locker.

Its a touching, violent racist spastic (Rocky) rescues and shags skinny pet shop mute (Adrian) from fat alcoholic brothers (fathers?) incestuous enslavement story which balances out the white on black crime finale.

It all may sound like the most epic XXX movie ever made, but Rocky 3 - 5 burst with potential porn stardom with names like Thunder Lips, the maniacal giant blonde slut, Clubber Lang aka "I hate Whitey", Ivan Drago who could be easily called Ivana Commie-on-your-dumb-American-face and fresh faced starlet 'Tommy Gun' (name of a real porn star), who wants it all and ends up biting off more than he could chew by going at it, hammer and tongs, with Rocky in the streets!
Rocky of course gets severely gang-banged by all of them, but ends up on top, and like a true punch drunk, brain damaged champ gets patronised by the cheering masses who in reality would have referred to him as Wop-py Balboa.

Oh, and i forgot to mention Rocky named the dog he bought from Adrian's crappy pet shop 'Butkis'! A cross between 'biscuit' and arse-licker'. 

Move over dogs bollocks....

"The Pus!"
A new exclamation term with dazzling syllabic efficiency for those with lisps or semi conscious.

Eg: "Check out my all beige Winnebago....its the pus!"

Pissbook/Facepiss

Facebook can be like pissing on a rock. The rock doesnt care, and you are only entertained by the splashback and the smell of invisible onions.

This Justin

Id struggle not to rape Beiber if i was his cell mate. And im really really against rape.
He has a Emma Watson look about him. But Emma is too boyish looking for me.

If he wore a nappy and i was wearing a giant cat outfit, id happily sit on his face as he slept. I imagine his face to be very comfy, and his slow suffocation only adding to the warm feeling of inner contentment. He is what young lesbians would look like if they werent so distorted with rage and hostility.

Thoughts on Church.

Charlotte Church has that bubbly, big titted charm that says "spunk on my tits". I get the feeling with her its impossible to not spunk on her tits. U could have a wank in the bathroom, and the spunk would find its way to her jiggling cleavage in the kitchen.

My only reservation is her Welshness. I imagine her vag has a full sweat on at all times, and has clumps of dried mud in the creases like a rugby players boot studs.

Still, id love to pop her into a corset and paddle the sweet christ out of her juicy wanton arse. (then come over her tits)

Extract from ' The Life of Galileo Galilei'

Galileo, naked from the waist up. Braving the vicious inquisition that vehemently accused him of heresy and threatened him with rusty death equipment, defended heliocentism until cut short by Cardinal Bellarmine who spunked his verbs out....

" In response to the tarted up twaddle mucked out by the accused in this banquet of sickening grandeur and knocked off fudgery i say this;
What is this shallow puddle of nauseatingly intellectual horse cock soup meant to be?

Couldnt you just rub urine into your quads if you wanted to spew forth some self gratifying vile piss instead of spiking our brains with the sole purpose of impressing everyone?

You look like a hairless cat bubbling with tumors. "

Chasing the bishops

Sybil Kufc, daughter and wife of ham consultant Sir Toby Slumpton, found herself in an amusing pickle with fire chief Dwight Speedling when several of the bishops she was using as fire lighters in a barbecue for her Thursday night witchery bash used their robes to trap heat and float away across the state of Nebraska. Dwight Speeding was called to shoot down the smoldering man-nuns who were scaring children with their glowing amber eyes and foolishly mistaken by locals for evil space ghosts.
Dwight and his men eventually saw the funny side of things and were invited to join Sybil and her coven for a night of debauched sexual abandon and Mario Kart tag team action.